Tips:The Unspoken Rules Of Situationships In Nairobi
A situationship is a twilight zone between a platonic friendship and a romantic relationship. In most cases you are engaging in intimacy with someone that is not your girlfriend or boyfriend.
06 Feb, 2023 | 11:12 AM By Nancy Marende
- Know where you stand
- No staying over more than one day
- Never say the ‘L’ Word
- No spending holidays together
- Use protection Always
A situationship is a twilight zone between a platonic friendship and a romantic relationship. In most cases, you are engaging in intimacy with someone that is not your girlfriend or boyfriend.
You do not necessarily need to have been friends but you share intimate moments with this person.
Basically, when you are in a situation ship, you are engaging in sexual intercourse in a relationship that is not defined, more or less friends with benefits kind of a relationship.
These are some of the rules to apply in situationships to help you not look like a clown.
Do not make whatever you are having with this person mean more than what it is. You are not their girlfriend or boyfriend, let it be just that.
Do not cross over when the other person has not crossed over yet.
If you decide to spend, do not overstay, leave immediately after breakfast. This is because staying over for lunch , then dinner makes it sound like you are in a relationship but you are not in a relationship with this person. It is just what it is.
Never say I love you in a situationship at any given point. I know things might get heated sometimes and you can get carried away in the moment because you start feeling like the moments you share are what feels like being in an actual relationship.
Please do not use the L word. Even if you feel it, do not say it, you will not die, keep it to yourself.
When you are in a situationship with this person, please they are not the person to go to for Valentines, Easter, Christmas or whatever holidays because when you go on that vacation or holiday, it solidifies something.
You will definitely get hooked, if you hadn’t then that will be the time especially if they do certain things for you.
Also, do not get upset when they do not do things for you on your birthday or Valentines et al because who are you to them again?
Always use condoms any time you engage in coitus. Since you are not in a committed relationship with this person, you might not know who else they are sleeping with.
Always use condoms to protect yourself from sexually transmitted infections because they could be having multiple sexual partners.
Do not use pet names with someone you are in a situationship with. Just say anything else but not babe, sweetheart etc because you might just be getting yourself in a hot mess.
Do not post your situationship on social media. It is going to be so embarrassing for you. You can only share a picture of them in a group where people will not know something is going on between the two of you.
Do not use words like my man, my woman when you are referring to your situationship. They are not yours , you share them with ten others. Always refer to them with their name.
The problem with situationships is that they feel like relationships. It's like when a woman gets pregnancy scare but they are not actually pregnant. You start feeling symptoms of a relationship but you are not actually in a relationship.
You might be hanging out with this person and creating moments together , but until they claim you do not think it as more of what it is.
Commitment with words and actions is key . Do not engage in anything relationship like with this person until there is clarity.
In conclusion, it does not mean it will end up badly if you break these rules but if things do not go the way you want them to, you will end up damaged and hurt.